Last night was nice :) I did the super saver thing and called Wan and we talked for a few hours :)

Oh oh oh! I woke up this morning to this song in my head,

"It's hard to believe,
that I couldn't see,
that you were always there beside me!
thought i was alone,
...something something...
but you were always there beside me!
This feeling's like no other,
I want you to know!
I've never found someone,
who knows me like you do...
the way you doooo"

I felt like doing the dance to. Hahaha
(Btw, the song is from Highschool Musical)

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I had a really really bad dream. I dreamed that I cheated on Wan and he found out! There was a lot of drama! Thank god it was only a dream... :(

I guess that is all for today. :) Later people!

I really shouldn't have taken that road I know leads to no where. The only person I end up hurting is myself. I shouldn't have allowed you to do that to me, I should have been more stronger. I hope it is not too late for me to wake up.

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I saw someone I had not seen for so long today. It was good seeing that person again :)

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I wonder if Wan is done with his paper today? Haven't sms-ed/ called my baby today :( I miss him. A lot. I hope he's okay... he's been quite stressed out with his exams. Don't worry, I know you can do it :) Love you

One done, more to go
I think I am pretty much settled on the accommodation thing. (Harap-harapnye mcm tu lah) My dad faxed the contract and paid the $425 deposit yesterday and this morning I have received a reply from them saying that they have got it :) I guess it's pretty much settled la?

Next is my medical checkup + my visa.

Weeee

It looks like most of my friends are into much younger guys :) aiyoh, I am still crazy about older guys (not old like datuk k, a few years older dah cukup) anyway, I'm happy that they're happy. Young or old, it doesn't matter. :)

Why is it so hard to let go of the past?

Why do bad things always happen to me?

So this is what happened.
Sha called me this morning and asked if I have received the email from Unicomm regarding my accommodation in NZ for February 2008. I was in front of my laptop so I checked if there was any email from them. Sadly, there wasn't. Not even one. Not even to inform me that I am in the waiting list. I was already disappointed (but not that worried) but then Sha said that everyone else has received theirs. I was so panic when she said that so I emailed Mr Matt Rogers (the person in charge of this whole accommodation thing). I couldn't bear waiting for his reply so I decided to call him instead.

Alhamdulillah, after giving him my details, he informed me that my application has been accepted and I should have received the email from Unicomm. So to cut a long story short, he gave me this email and asked me to send this person an email and ask them to send the accommodation offer again. :) I have to pay them before this 30th of Oct so I hope I get the email soon!

Oh I thought the time in New Zealand is only about 3 hours difference from Malaysia! It's not! No wonder they did not pick up the phone! When I checked the time in NZ, it was already 5.42 pm! Mana ada orang kat ofis la iqa! Haiyoh! The last person I called kat Unicomm cakap macam ni "please call back tomorrow". Haha! Mesti the person marah gile time die nak balik ofis sibuk pulak nak call... hehe. Nasib baik sempat call Matt Rogers! and nasib baik I can understand their english! HAHAHA. ntah ape ape je iqa!

Thank you Zaty and Sha for the help :) LOVE you girls la!

Bace and view from bottom keatas *kes malas nak susun*

Sorry for not updating, I was in Perak since Thursday and celebrated our raya there. I have loads to write about but I just do not have the energy to do it so I'll just post some pictures. Enjoy!

Selamat Hari Raya
Maaf Zahir dan Batin

Berbuka with my sisters :)

Body Mass Index

Current weight :
14o.8 lbs

Height:
5 ft 03 inch

BMI : 26.6

BMI Categories:

• Underweight = <18.5
• Normal weight = 18.5-24.9
• Overweight = 25-29.9
• Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater

I am currently in the overweight category. I have to lose about 10 pounds to get into the normal category. Wish me luck!

Pro-Ana? Maybe

I saw "The Thin Club" on DH&H the other day and boy am I interested! YES I KNOW IT IS UNHEALTHY to lose weight that way but I think it really works! It's not that hard, I think. There is this one girl, she started at 106 lbs in the beginning of the show and at the end, she was only 98 lbs! She was soooo skinny! I am not planning to be that skinny but if pro-ana really works, then why not, right? I mean, I've tried exercising and eating right but to no avail. I think I sort of have done this pro-ana thing back when I was 14 and I did lose a lot of weight. I went from a size L to a size Xs! The thing about not eating is, once you get used to it, you won't even feel hungry! That is what I remembered when I kind of stopped eating back then. It's amazing how much weight you can lose in less than a year! It would be nice to be small again...especially when you're 20 and people are paying so much attention on how you look!

I think I'm going to cut back on my eating and see if it works for me! But I'm going to throw in some exercises everyday to speed up the process. :)

Oh, I am not going to totally follow this pro-ana thing. I'm just going to take some things that work and leave out things that might do me harm.

Oh I found the girl from the show, here she is!

Sabrina

Sabrina is a fun, sporty and active 16 year old living with her parents in Lincolnshire. She has always been slim but has been using pro-anorexia sites for four months to help her lose a lot of weight quickly.

Like many girls she's ultra-conscious about her figure. She's had a history of dieting but not anorexia. She diets alongside online friends and posts daily in her online journal with updates of her weight loss.

She admits that the majority of girls on the pro-ana sites have a higher BMI (body mass index) than her but finds the sites helpful with her extreme weight loss goals. She feels the girls on it are 'really supportive and lovely'.

Her first goal was to get from 106lbs (7st 8lbs) to 102lbs (7st 4lbs) for her prom and she looks forward to her next goal of 98lbs (7st) for her GCSE results.

Pro-ana sites seem to be making her weight loss obsession more extreme – she is now picking up tips from the sites on ways to avoid eating.

(http://www.channel4learning.net/support/programmenotes/micro/thinclub/sabrina.html)

Some info on pro-ana:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pro-ana

After looking at some pro-ana sites, I have to admit that there is more bad to it than good. BUT, I am still going to eat less because being an emotional eater than I am now is ALSO unhealthy. It is better to be thin and live up to society's expectations than to be a fat emotional eater! At least by being thin, people accept you more than when you are fat and ugly.

I think this website is quite helpful,

http://www.angelfire.com/indie/thininstead/