I have never felt so alone in my life like I do right now, right this moment, and it's not even because of the fact I'm so far from home.

When people were telling me how hard it is going to be, I chose not to listen. I chose to block out what ever is unpleasant to my ears and I chose to believe that it is going to be okay.

I thought, by going away, it would actually fix things that were broken long before. I thought, by going away, it would make things a little better. I thought...

I do not know how long I can stay in this state of denial. I do not want to give up and let go of something I have grown so attached to.

Who am I kidding? It is clear that what used to be there is no longer there. I am only hurting myself by believing that everything is fine.


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I should not let this affect me.